"I Want Bof!"

So, things have changed since I started my life outside of my "comfort zone." I like to think that I have learned so much, and grown into a better person since that day I moved away from home.

I can say that since then I have really begin to figure out who matter in my life. There are always those people in our lives that we know are always there; we don't know how they got there, just that they are there. I love the people in my life who play this role, thinking about them is what keeps me going through my hard times. Seeing their faces always reminds me of what is important to me.

Just over a year ago I move from St. Louis to Orlando for school. It was possibly the biggest thing I've ever done in my life, but looking at it now I am so glad I did it. There are days where I am at school for hours on end and all I want to do is go home, but this is where I take a step back and re-evaluate why I'm down here. I didn't come here so i could get a job and make a ton of money. I didn't come here cause it is an easy life. I didn't even come here to please my family. I made the decision to come here because I get to do what I love to do, on a daily basis. Yes, the potential income that can come from this career can be great, but that's not why I am here, I'm here for MY passion.

This is where I have hit a roadblock. When I first moved I said that I would never really get homesick, and in some ways this is true. But in the time since I've moved I've grown even closer to my "family", and now that I'm never really home all I want to do is be with them. They are my life, and I would do anything for them. So to be over a thousand miles away, and only see them a couple times a year kills me. I have began to hate the airport back home, because the only tie I'm there is when I'm leaving them. I have their pictures up all around me to put a smile on my face when I need it, but sometimes that just makes me want to be home and with them even more.

So the question that is constantly on my mind, is how much am I going to have to give up in order to live my dream? I already feel like a little piece of my is lost every time I have to say 'goodbye', and it still hurts to do it. Then when I'm not with them I'm aways thinking about the next time I will get to be with them, and it just drags on. In some ways I feel like a dog standing between two people having to choose. Do I choose my dream job or do I choose the people who mean the world to me? Well.... I don't see why I can't have both! So in the words of Radio (great movie btw), "I want bof!"